Saturday, March 17, 2007

Three things I know to be true about music

1. If Lionel Richie received loyaties for every time "Hello" was played in Vietnam, he would be the richest man in the Universe. I'm talking richer than Bill Gates, Donald Trump and the Queen combined. There would be gold statues of Lionel Richie in every village and town on the planet. Seriously, he would own you and your house, we would all be Lionel Richie's bitches. Whether its a bartender singing it, a saxophone musak version, a traditional Vietnamese band playing it or the sweet, sweet original, there is no escape.

2. No matter where you go, there is no excuse for liking Fall Out Boy. No matter if you haven't heard any rock music in two months and have been subjected to the worst pop the Western and Asian world has to offer. Even when you're ears prick up expectantly in hope of a good song when you hear a guitar, as soon as you know its Fall Out Boy, bludgeon yourself. Has this crap made it to Australia? I hope you're all safe...

3. When in Revelations, they talk about pestilence and plague, it is obviously a metaphor for the Pussycat Dolls. There is no village remote enough to avoid them and when the hill tribes of SE Asia stop humming "Hello" they inevitably follow it with some PCD. The end of the world is nigh and the four horseman of the Apocalypse are wearing hot pants and pushing your buttons baby.

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Off to China tomorrow. Weird. Pictures soon if I find the technology...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi

Sorry to tell you Fall Out Boy has reached NZ. Promise to keep turning off the tv when they are on. Luckily they dont play them on the radio station I listen to. No Lionel either luckily.

Andrea