God save the Queens

London (again) to Paris.


Remember this? The Fugazi In on the killtaker sleeve signed by Ian MacKaye. Well, after receiving this prized gift, my good friend Claire got her reward...


...two pints. That smile is the definition of "happy camper."


This was the night before I hit the chunnel to Paris. I hung out with Claire eating, potentially, the crappiest pizza in all of London and arguing about what is more embarrassing to have on my ipod, Coldplay or Limp Bizkit? Personally, I was glad she didn't see the Jack Johnson records I have... (I can explain all of these musical anomalies with mathematics my friends).


So Paris. Yes, you want to see the Lourve, the tower and all those shenanigans but sadly I'm not that predictable... I give you hay. Pretty much the first thing I did was go to the Furia Sound festival which had a very North Queensland music festival circa 1995 feel about it. Why? Because any concert promoter worth their salt knows not to give rowdy rock fans access to hay (a common feature of North Queensland festivals). Why? Because when the rock takes over, you just gotta start throwing it.. at the band... in the air... wherever you see fit... and Thurston Moore is not a man to throw hay at.


Furia was held in a place called Cergy Pontoise, a half hour train ride out of the city. To my credit, I only got lost once and that was in the tunnels of one of the underground stations looking for a ticket machine. On the train trip out, these gypsy guys started playing Amelie like music much to the consternation of the sneery indie kid across from me. Poor guy, he picked at his cons, rolled his eyes and muttered under his breath the whole time. An awkward time was had by all.


Being a student of sociology, I was interested to see if there were any differences between Australian and French rock fans. Here are three things that caught my eye: 1. Even though the festival consisted of three stages set amongst hilly grasslands, a number of the patrons thought it was a good idea to wear high heals. I haven't seen that too often in Australia but it seemed very rawk n' roll in a tacky Motley Crue kind of way. 2. You know that free hug guy from Sydney. Well, that craze has caught on in France and every ten minutes or so I was asked for a hug by some annoying adolescent. Of course, I obliged, I'm not that bitter. 3. Crowd surfing is very "in" with the "youngsters" here where I have found this trend decreasing in oz. I kind of hate them because you're minding your own business, watching the band and then suddenly someone's kicking you in the back of the head. As they pass over me I like to give them a quick punch to the kidneys. I kid, I kid. I just try and steal their wallets.


Those of you who know me know that I am a terrible music snob but I tried going to this festival with an open mind. I tried watching some local bands but They. Were. Awful. This wasn't a language barrier thing, I know the language of rock whatever the dialect and they weren't talking to me. This left me with the two big bands of the day, Sonic Youth (above) and Queens of the Stone Age.


Some of my dearest friends love Sonic Youth and are often exasperated and dismayed at my dislike of them. I've seen them before and they're ok but I can't listen to their records. But with a sense of open mindedness I watched them again hoping I'd get it. I didn't. It was kind of boring and watching Lee Ranaldo was kind of like watching an aging high school teacher play guitar at school assembly. I feel petty for saying that but it is true and I haven't even mentioned Kim Gordon's dancing out of respect for this iconic figure (I'm not going to buy that so uncool its cool argument for a second). I couldn't work out why they had two bass players playing same the bass parts either, that shit don't make no sense! Sure there were moments of brilliance (great drummer too) but the most interesting thing about the set was Tony the Tiger crowd surfing. If only he had crowd surfed for the entire show it would have probably made it more interesting for me. Probably but probably not.


Tony the tiger (not crowd surfing).


The only constant about Sonic Youth is that their fans look the same the world over. I haven't seen this many pairs of cons and skinny jeans since Sigur Ros last played the Enmore Theatre. Actually, if they put little tracking devices in Cons, tied it to a satellite and put it on the net, you'd be able to see where Sonic Youth were playing at anytime of the day or night by the cons cluster.


So it was onto Queens. To be fair, Sonic Youth never stood a chance in my eyes as Queens are a mild obsession of mine. OK, a total obsession. This is the eighth time I've seen them and given how often they tour Australia (urm, not very often) that's a lot.


As always, Queens put on an entertaining show. There are three things that I love about them. First: I can say I like at least 95% of their songs and given how picky I am, that's a pretty amazing strike rate. Second: They are (particularly band leader Josh Homme who is often referred to as my boyfriend by some because of my unhealthy obsession with the band) incredible musicians but can be understated as well. There's a certain soul to their music which speaks to me. Third: They make me want to get on my knees, do devil signs and then dance like an idiot. They make me happy in that way that makes you blush whenever their name is mentioned... much like a Jane Austin novel. Queens of the Stone Age are my Mr Darcy!




They even had a Tony moment when Homme thought he was hallucinating and seeing Tony the Tiger. He invited him up on stage for a hug and so that everyone could share in a "mass hallucination together." The crowd started chanting "Tony! Tony! Tony!" although it sounded more French, like the guy from 'Allo ' Allo saying "Toné! Toné! Toné!"


It was an interesting gig for a couple of reasons. Firstly, the band stuck to playing its simpler, poppier songs rather than the dark complex ones. That was fine by me as they played my latest fave Misfit Love as well classics such as Lost Art of Keeping a Secret and three tracks off their first album. Sadly, they did play one bum song off their new album (Battery Acid) which looks like its more fun to play than listen to. Secondly, their new bass player can emulate some of the screams of the old sacked bass player so that was a joy to see. I know that means nothing to pretty much 99.9% of people reading this but I like my screamy bits and miss them dearly.



All in all, a great show and well worth the hassle of trying to navigate the Paris public transport system. God save the Queens.

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Sorry for the blurry, crappy, far away photos. My zoom ain't that hot and even though I wasn't too far away in the crowd I was trying to stick a bit to the side to avoid the moshers so I wouldn't go home smelling like Eau de Toilette la Sweaty Fifteen Year Old Boy. Its almost as bad as that perfume by Britney: Eau de Toilette la White Trash.