Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Zap! Pow! Kazaam!!!

1. The Eiffel Tower is perhaps best known as a the prop that Grace Jones sky dived off in the James Bond film, A View To A Kill. The Tower's second claim to fame is that Duran Duran shot the video for the theme tune to A View To A Kill there. The "disturbance in the force" is a direct reference to Star Wars and an indirect reference to Chuck Norris.
2. Spidey Senses are goosepimples Spiderman gets when aroused. The "I sense the presence line..." is a direct quote from Star Wars when Darth Vader senses Ben Kenobi on the Death Star. Sadly, neither Spiderman, Darth Vader or Ben Kenobi have visited the Eiffel Tower.

3. Ruth has had a long history of crime and can in fact be linked to the Great Train Robbery and the missing Dillinger gold.

4. Dan Brown wrote The da Vinci Code, that ripped off so many other books it was hard to name them all and a team of scholars are expected to have the book referenced by 2087. Umberto Eco's Foucault's Pendulum also prattles on about the bloodline of Christ and the Knight's Templar, only Eco can string a sentence together. Finally, no matter how bad The da Vinci Code is, it does not excuse Tom Hanks' mullet in the film.

5. This is in fact a stupid statement when most books are infinitely better than their film adaptations. This is true for all movies except for Transformers.
6. Tom Hanks starred in a film called Castaway where he was, amazingly, a castaway on a deserted island and his only companion was a volleyball called Wilson. It is still astounding that an inanimate object gave a better performance than Hanks in this movie. It is also an interesting fact that 9 out of 10 people in the world wish Tom Hanks was actually deserted on an island... filled with venomous snakes.

7. I hate the Doors.
8. It is actually tradition to leave a lipstick kiss on Wilde's tomb as tribute. Sadly, I was without my lippy at the time and as a rule, generally do not make out with tomb stones.
9. In the early 90s, a young Australian singer named Collette released a cover of Ring My Bell. It is plausibly the worst cover of all time if you discount any cover song by Britney Spears, Tiffany or Limp Bizkit.

10. Joan of Arc is not a lesbian icon that I know of, I just said that to be "provocative" and "edgy". That said, Milla Jovovich played Joan of Arc in a Luc Besson film called The Messenger and therefore that version of Joan of Arc could be deemed worthy of lesbian icon status.

11. There is, in fact, no Eiffel Tower growing out of Ruth's head.

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